“The Dog” Journal
Welcome to the Dog Journal, a blog where I periodically share my best finds for taming those puppies that gnaw at your planner.
Could be a quick time management tip, a smell-the-flowers moment, a comment overheard on the elevator. Whatever the inspiration, I hope you’ll blog right along with me by commenting and sharing your tips and stories for taming an overbooked life.
MoodOff Day = Challenge
After challenging others to observe the second annual MoodOff Day, a dose of good old-fashioned guilt inspired me to power down my smartphone this morning at 6 and not text or call anyone till at least 11 a.m.
This was to show solidarity with the MoodOff movement’s message that we have become smartphone/text-obsessed and it’s high time to resort to some good old-fashioned connection.
I’m the first to admit my obsessions. I love sending and receiving texts, and though I’m a terribly unreliable FB poster, I do check in and lurk from time to time.
As for MoodOff Day, I’m happy to report I survived it. I’d like to say it was because I felt so much peace and tranquility disconnected. But actually, it was due to a texting friend’s suggestion that it was OK to use my landline.
Also, my daughter was in town this weekend visiting from Chicago, so I rousted her out of bed in time for plenty of conversation before we left for my son and daughter-in-law’s, where there was more conversation and entertainment by my three-year-old granddaughter.
Later, when I realized we were running late for a restaurant reservation, I nudged my daughter, who was not observing MoodOff Day, to make the call. Oops.
So I was not on my phone but I was constantly thinking about the fact that I was not on my phone and working around it. I guess that’s a start – recognizing obsession, briefly stopping, and enjoying the moment.
I think I’ll be ready to do it again. In another 365 days.
Goodnight iPad = Good Advice
Shopping at our spiffy new neighborhood toy store, I discovered a children’s book that should be required reading for all the overbooked attorneys I coach.
Goodnight, iPad has a familiar cover. It looks like Goodnight Moon, that old bedtime standby by Margaret Wise Brown, in which children say a ritualistic goodnight to their daytime surroundings and toys before drifting off to sleep.
In Goodnight iPad, though, author Ann Droyd has us bidding a bedtime goodbye instead to Angry Birds, smart phones and tablets. No doubt it will strike a chord with parents of teen-agers, who wrestle with shutting down their electronics. That’s probably why Droyd subtitled it “A Parody for the Next Generation.”
But while we’re at it, some of us might start reading it with the thought of untethering ourselves.
For those who want a more adult untethering guide, there’s also Harvard Business School professor Leslie Perlow’s Sleeping with Your Smartphone: How to Break the 24/7 Habit and Change the Way You Work. Read on….but possibly not on an electronic device.
E-Mail Birth Control
I don’t know about you, but my e-mails are having babies. It seems that every vendor I’ve favored over the holidays, either online or in person, is my new best friend. And what are friends for if not for letting you in on the latest clearance sale with free shipping or – in case you’ll soon be cruising – some can’t-miss summer items for the ship.
True, some of the offers are educational. I never knew – till yesterday, when it was offered at 63% off – that green-coffee-bean extract might may “reduce the release of glucose into the blood to support healthy blood-sugar levels and aid in weight reduction.”
The most effective mode of birth control seems to be Unsubscribe. But the New Year’s Un-Subscription drive can be rocky. Here’s a shout-out to those who make it easy with “instant unsubscribe.” One click and you’re done. Not so much happy shouting to those who are sure you didn’t really mean it and want you to verify. And a giant groan to those who need you to dig out your password, change your settings or review of list of 15 possible message types you would still like to receive.
A positive thought in all this grousing. Asking the question, “Is this clutter or useful in moving me forward?” is good practice for cleaning closets, managing time, and reviewing relationships as we launch into 2013. What else in your life do you need to unsubscribe to?
Thanksgiving Travel Tip: Be Grateful. Duh….
OK. This sounds too simple for words. But the best empirically tested wisdom positive psychologists may have to offer for surviving Thanksgiving travel may be to practice gratitude, with a good share of kindness thrown in.
This is not simply because gratitude and kindness is the reason for the season. Rather, these are two of the most powerful positivity builders in our arsenal of building well-being. But like many simple schemes in life, this one is not easy. Particularly in the middle of a crowded airport, seated on the floor by the back wall, after the third cancellation of your flight. Throw in a few harried travelers with high-pitched, in-your-face screams – the kind my mom would have called “extra pushy” – and kindness and gratitude are the farthest from your mind.
So why should we try, and how should we do it? The best scientific reason is that some very good research out of University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill, teaches us that having at least three positive emotional reactions to each negative one is the tipping point for well-being. According to professor/researcher Barbara Fredrickson, positivity opens us up, makes us feel good and changes the way our mind works for the better. To make it easy to monitor and increase positivity, she offers a website that lets you test and record your own positivity ratio for free.
She cautions that we’re not talking about faking it. The old grin and bear it doesn’t cut it. We’re talking the genuine article. So how? Two excellent research-based strategies are (1) to prep ourselves for the coming holiday season by recording three things that went well before turning in for the night at least a few times a week and (2) make that travel day a “counting kindnesses” day – in other words a day we focus on doing kind things for others and write them down.
So head to the airport already feeling grateful for those things that have gone well, and pack a paper and pen for counting those kindnesses you do for other harried travelers and maybe that customer service rep trapped behind the airline counter.
Finally, don’t forget to comb travel day for humorous ironies, and be willing to laugh at the global impatience of it all. Here we are, annoyed with people on our way to a place of gratitude 10,000 miles away. Can we shorten the trip by practicing gratitude before we get there?
